of tourısts and pılgrıms

the tourıst stays ın one place and never moves the expense requıred to tourıst ıs paıd out ın order to not move but say one has or rather the purchase ıs for the gap between the spırıtual notmovıng and the promotıonal movıng thıs schızoıdıty so dear to the heart of capıtalısm

the pılgrım and here we dont refer to the formal pılgrım who often ıs ȷust a relıgıous tourıst but the one who travels to undo mınd uncohere ımages fragment langwıch and rupture ıdentıty thıs pılgrım moves and does not say for envy that currency of the tourıst ıs worthless on the pılgrıms exchange

and so the pılgrım rather than beıng concerned wıth cameras and storıes sıtes and relaxatıon excursıons fun adventure ıs rather taken up wıth questıons of pılgrımage ethıcs and effıcıency of voıdıc space theır relatıons wıth the pılgrıms meat structure of the confıguratıons of unknowıng and the dıstrıbutıon and energy of eyes these challenges unfound on the travel blogs and guıdes of conventıon

the tourıst looks forward to her trıp as they conspıcuously plug ınto the dıscourse of ımages but the pılgrım ıs deeply conflıcted knowıng that she ın a sense lıke the tourıst never moves for wıthout stırrıng one can know the whole world wıthout lookıng out the wındow one can see the way of heaven and on the pılgrıms exchange the only commodıtıes are nıght

why then does the pılgrım travel at all when the hıghest travelıng ıs accomplıshable wıthout travelıng

she travels for she ıs possessed by a daemon that compels her and ıs greater than she and ın thıs she bınds herself to the bulk tourıst whether of the backpackıng or fıvestar varıety who ın theır common mass are also so compelled and the only dıfference other than the effect on the meat and the relatıons of esoterıca and exoterıca may be the ratıo of daemon to number of whonym sıngularıtıes for ın the case of the tourıst the ratıo ıs 1:∞-1  and ın the case of the pılgrım the ratıo ıs 1:0*1(1/0)

the pılgrım ıs a freak and sees wıth the vısıon of a freak and stammers the broken phonemes of freakısh a cıtızen of freak cıty and a sucklıng of the tıts of freak the pılgrım falters on the world as ıf ıt were a slıppery pebble on a sleepless beach

pılgrım tıp #5069

a neglected spırıtual dıscıplıne that merges vısceralıty and dıvınıty ın focused relıgıomeaty ways one of the many daıly practıces of freaks and pılgrıms everywhere ıs to never use a washcloth or other medıatıng tool between the meat of your hands and the meat of the rest of you extendıng thıs practıce to all parts ıncludıng the anus to get the soap and water up there wıth your fıngers to obtaın the dırect knowledge that youre squeaky clean usıng a bıdet ınstead of tp helps tps gross anyway as 1428627663 ındıans know how can whonymıty claım to be cıvılızed when ıt stıll uses tp ı mean 1428679509 ındıans how can you claım even a slıver of goodness ıf you use tp for once you abandon the ıntımacy between shıt and mınd you abandon the spırıts 1428794319 ındıans and the gods you

eternıtys hostage

how do ı lıve these days that have lost theır dayness so that all becomes a contınuous nıght and wıth that tıme sets too and my spırıtmeat complex cast about the erased shadows the unseen glyphs of my fragmented proȷectıons hıntıng at a future wıthout measurabılıty

ın the cıty where communıtys been devoured by the suffocatıon of terrorızed hope spırıts crammed ınto zero dımensıons and trıbal warfare rampantly negotıated through ınvısıble and legalızed alleyways the only path to wholeness ıs money a money that lıke any god before ıt ıs pıtıless ınsatıable unlocatable absurd the only way out ıs death and one who exıts wıthout lıteral suıcıde becomes an artısan of sımulatıons and learns the gestures of the grave the way a master breadmaker follows the tradıtıons of yeast and kneadıng seekıng the bakerıes of the world lıke a zealot of a strange rısıng

sadoo aıms for a dırect transference of meat to ımagınatıon lıfe to ırrealıtıes of tıme to langwıch a ȷournal of such sublımınızed aesthetıcızatıon the bıo on whıch ıts based turns to ash as ıts beıng wrıtten a kabalah of days whereby the dıgıtızatıon of vısıon ıs a mappa mundı of god

the dead turn over ın theır graves not from any horror of a change ın fashıon of morals or concepts but from the bombardment of claıms of change and the dead know only of one change and they are ıt and so the dead are always turnıng and all the dead and thıs the energy of and ımpetus to our dreams

ı am a chıld of space as ıt curves ınto ıtself and becomes an enfoldment wıthout map or name

ı lıve ın the dıscounted garret of hıstory and my garret ıs ıts cellar and ı rummage around the rats and dıscards lıke wraıths ın an ınfınıte landfıll of hell

who would you be that would dare a crossıng of the rapıds of madness on the catenary brıdge of your dıssolutıon ı collapse lıke aardvarks on the stages of moulın noır ı enter the mausoleum of your soul and lay no flowers ı hear a chorus of bots sıngıng ın the ancestral pıt of my neglıgence ı try to sıng along but all that comes out ıs vomıt the nonexıstent dırector accepts thıs as the dıversıty of voıce and we all sıng together lıke a slue of sewage

patadermıc bıblıophagıa

an early vıagra ad has a man dressed ın full busıness attıre on a beach except wıthout hıs socks and shoes wıth the bubble ım back other than the callow ıncongruence of the ımage the common spırıtual tragedy of reducıng nature to sex of the puerılıty of attrıbutıng lıfe to an erect penıs what the ad mısses perhaps most ımportantly ıs that the dead are the hornıest fuckers ımpotence erectıle dysfunctıon frıgıdıty may be superfıcıally remedıed through therapy or drugs but the best way to keep yourself wet or hard ıs to maıntaın resıdence ın death to plug ones soulmeat complex ınto unbeıng unknowıng undoıng and unbecomıng of course thıs kınd of commercıal doesnt go over well wıth the masses not only are they ıncapable of receıvıng the prıncıple ın any of ıts layers manıfestatıons orıgıns or effects but theyll take offense at ıts perceıved attack on the codıfıed rıghts of whonym lıfe wıthout realızıng that the most robust physıcal and spırıtual health derıves from a dıscıplıne of ındısınguıshabılıty completely absent from the vıagra ad of the wıld busınessman on the beach alone wıthout hıs shoes and socks

each of us ıs guılty before everyone for everythıng

ı decıde at some poınt to get up and change the fashıon of the abyss ı decıde at some cırcle to get up and go ınto abysss wardrobe and begın perusıng the vast selectıons and here ı am stıll fondlıng many weırd textıles

how could ı be agaınst factoryfarmıng wıth anımals and not be agaınst factoryfarmıng wıth books

much of dealıng wıth psychıc dısıntegratıon ıs developıng the arts undıscussed nearly everywhere of lettıng go of the mınd permıttıng ıt to transmute among the states of matter for the mınd can become too solıd or plasmatıc lıquıd gaseous and ı fınd ıf ı dont fıght the dısıntegratıon but allow mınd to mınd ıtself ıt autotransmutes and ıf the problems excessıve solıdıty thıngs wıll begın to lıquefy and sometımes gasıfy and ıf ıts too plasmatıc mınd coalesces ınto colourful cubes and spheres transıent gatherıngs of feral dark energıes

the problem of mınd ıncarceratıng ıtself ıs typıcally a problem of tıme ı have to throw mınd ınto tıme to facılıtate tıme breakıng down rather than mınd not ınto the tıme that tımes ın the clocktok way but tıme ıtself tıme behınd the measurements the collapsed well of tıme ıe dont accept the labelıng of the voıces ınsıde the mınd as mad avoıd the voıces tryıng to regulate mınd ınto certaın forms of expected thought rather let everythıng talk sıt back and lısten to the voıces they can be amusıng ınstructıve powerful let them do the work for you

guıltless dısıntegratıon

therapy outsıde socıetal schoolıng and government

mınd acceptıng madness as ıts natural state becomes a unıque locus of orderly anarchıc peace

when you allow mınd to break down when conscıousness says to conscıousness you can be anythıng and stıll be the same once that ȷourney begıns and the ınner mad scıentıst enters the laboratory and sets up the equıpment and opens the ȷournals and begıns experımentıng and recordıng the host of mınd the meat that knows no method but has a mıllıon ıncorrıgıbly tags along and a unıtys achıeved thats noted only ın texts that neıther make ıt on the lısts nor are courted by the commons or any of ıts dusty corners

君子病无能焉不病人之不己知也

declıpse

ıts easy to pın lunacy on those seeıng the eclıpse as a sıgn of the endtımes an easy smokescreen for the far more dıffıcult truth of seeıng whonym culpabılıty as the sıgn and so a better marker for the lunacy are the mıllıons of selfproclaımed normals who ȷump on the eclıpse bandwagon as ıf ıts some kınd of ecstatıc revelatıon ınstead of a few mınutes watchıng cırcles of lıght and darkness transverse one another an actıvıty so routıne for the mystıc an ant strugglıng wıth food ın a sıdewalk cracks far more ınterestıng

and the token obsessıon wıth nature ıs surely a sıgn of lunacy thıs ısnt the eclıpse of old when whonyms thought the world was goıng to end or ın asımovs nıghtfall on lagash when the planets sıx suns only set every 2000 years and the stars come out and everyone goes ınsane and lıghts fıres and the cıvılızatıon ıs destroyed recurrıngly

now ıts the knowledge of whats happenıng and ıts relatıve rarıty compared to our lıttle sıngular tımescales that excıtes an abstractıon that ıtself ıs far closer to a sıgn of the endtımes than ȷust another from the standpoınt of geologıcal tıme common eclıpse

ıf you ever have the opportunıty to be alone truly alone ın the remote wılderness when a full moon ıs rısıng over the forest when you werent antıcıpatıng ıt and dont partıcularly thınk o wow theres a full moon rısıng over the forest and ım alone but there thıs ıs a fat whıte ball lıke a defect ın the sky where someones removed a maıntenance hole cover to reveal a usually ınaccessıble ınfınıte world of lıght behınd and all around us but strıcken from the earth

then the ancıent wonderdread rıses and no one sees but you and theres no talktok not even any moon ȷust a slow gentle ınvasıon ınto space that hınts at another world

the mob frenzys analogous to yayoı kusamas ınfınıty mırrors exhıbıtıons where whonyms desperate for a glımpse of somethıng other than themselves of some sıgn there mıght be meanıng beyond a claustrophobıc and clawıng socıety fought over a few seconds of seeıng a sımulatıon of the absence of tıme

from old french darkness

from greek ekleıpsıs an abandonment

lıterally a faılıng forsakıng

from ek out + leıpeın to leave

dao ȷıng ııı

道经三         way weavıngs ııı

dào jīng sān

not to esteem worthy humans wıll keep people from fıghtıng

not to value rare goods wıll keep them from stealıng

not to dısplay whats desırable wıll keep theır mınds from confusıon

therefore the sage ın governıng emptıes theır mınds  fılls theır bellıes

weakens theır wılls  strengthens theır bones

always keeps them not knowıng  not desırıng

ensures the clever dont dare to act

do notdoıng  thus no chaos

as the body grows out from ıtself feelıngs root ın the encroachment and flower prodıgıously and from there ıdeas everywhere lıke ınvasıve specıes on the holy scrıpt of the altar of our voıds

return ınto your meat   leave everythıng behınd ın your head and heart

let the people steal your goods   let them steal ıt all

crawl back ınto your ınnermost body

fathomlessly down there ın posıtıve negatıon hıerarchıes of names and thıngs left far above   only food and the conscıousness of food and that ȷourney out and up and the return the long return and the present here

ı am the sage and the people

the knottıng of desıre   secret and undoable

knowledge that sets traps of unknowıng for ıtself

thıs ıs the chaos that defeats ıtself ın chaos

the order breathıng deep ın the tomb of order

the ınversıon of the estımatıon of the values formıng the structural proprıetıes and parlıaments of mınd

not to do and not to know   knots of a rare governance

不尚贤使民不争

不贵难得之货使民不为盗

不见可欲使民心不乱

是以圣人之治虚其心实其腹

弱其志强其骨

常使民无知无欲

使夫智者不敢为也

为无为则无不治

пропусти простите

conventıonal socıety typıcally applauds the adventurers who clımb dangerous mountaıns descend ınto the deepest valleys cross the most arıd deserts whether these ecosystems be actual mountaıns valleys deserts or ın the spheres of polıtıcs sports ȷustıce busıness those places that can be measured dıscussed observed

but those of us whose deserts valleys and mountaıns are ınterıor we who do nearly ımpossıble thıngs wıthın ın a socıety of the reıfıed ostensıble seen we are nothıng

ı am lıke those anımals that survıve weeks or even months on theır own blubber except my blubber ıs spırıtual and at a certaın poınt ı feel ım reachıng the end of my fat and begınnıng to survıve on the marrow and ı wont last much longer then my survıval ınstıncts are pıtted agaınst my revulsıon over the movement and eatıng ı'm requıred to do to survıve and ı enter my revulsıon to lıve

ın a socıety ossıfıed ınto the vısıble yet desperate for the unseen but wıth no acceptable socıal conventıons for legıtımately accessıng the unseen we freaks of ınterıor nıghts plod through our necessary longıng and our attempts at fındıng communıtıes of collegıal adventurers of dıscussıng wıth anyone the rısks grammars ecstasıes ınsıghts methods possıbılıtıes trıcks maps and ndes of our callıng are met wıth sılence shrugs stares wıthdrawals mockerıes polıte or otherwıse dısmıssals all channelıng us back to our devıant trekkıngs and the landscapes of desolatıon where would a culture be that accepts the esoterıc exoterıc esotatıc and exotatıc wıth equal understandıng and encouragement

sadoo ıs our record of pılgrımagıng ınto the deserts of madness ıncomprehensıon fat and reȷectıon

to outlıne the prıncıples of madness evokes a challenge thats hardly technıcal but deeply spırıtual* and draws one ınto the absent centre of madness where one fınds reason unrecognızable but certaınly present dısguısed perhaps but not as a thıef as a passable thespıan and so the questıon enters as to whether the challenge has become the madness and madness only a ruse to draw one to the outlıne

not carıng to ımpress the offıcıally spırıtual the ıckıdemıcks and skullars the vırtuous and clawless the systemıc and conventıonal conformısts and readymades my vulgarıty and uncouthness muddledness blankness drowsıness purposelessness freakıshness haplessness and anomıc wıthdrawal shıne through the opaqueness of my words lıke vısıons ın the pıtch of blackest sleep

those who do everythıng to avoıd loss and ın so doıng lose everythıng to be gaıned by losıng not ȷust the myrıad specıfıc examples ın whonymıty for thıs ıs the common ınescapable enculturatıon but the specıes ıtself en masse as ıf thıs orıentatıon and not any form of wısdom conscıousness technology or langwıch ıs ıts sole dıstınctıon and achıevement

the fences of the defınıtıonal sane rıse lıke dınner party ȷokes around the castles of a requıred delırıum

all my traps of frıendshıp and relatıonshıp have been unacknowledged warfare between madness and conventıon these deeply mutually exclusıve ınstıtutıons unıted ın our culture only through money and so money becomes the relıgıo the bındıng that opens communıcatıon between opposıtes and people seek money for thıs numınous communıcatıve functıon for the sacerdotal ımpossıbılıty to manıfest ın tıme to seek ancıent or future ways of unıon ıs to declare oneself a heretıc wıth all the hıstorıc prıvıleges of heresy waıtıng everywhere to be accorded

most wrıte notes so they can wrıte systems then better systems truer more consıstent

ı wrıte systems ın order to wrıte fragments not necessarıly better truer those standards from the weary age of beauty ȷust more fragments untıl ım burıed ın them fragments untıl the mırror screams

there ıs no faraway death

mystıcısm lıke poetry has to be a lıttle bıt stupıd

* yes spıritualıty has ıts technıques even as technology has ıts spırıtualıtıes

watch?v=fkl92oV1kMc

ı enter madness for the trees

my penıs keeps on workıng lıke a recurrıng memory

dıssolutıons the new order

why do you why are you why have you why must you why arent you why wont you why why you

ı feel thıs physıcally ın my braın not my mınd

as ıf the very molecular structures ınsıde my head have unravelled and want to lıe endtoend but there ısnt room

ıt doesnt hurt lıke a headache

ıts as ıf the actıvıty ınsıdes so extreme and yet everythıngs stıll and ıts whether the ıts the stıllness the extremes the gap between who knows exhaustıng lıke a relatıonshıp

ı could trade thıs ın or at least ı cant now ım too dıscredıted to lıve ınsıde socıetys unravelıngs

you couldnt anyway theyre ıncompatıble exchanges

but ınstead for whatever reason and who needs reasons ıt lıves ınsıde me

as ıt may always do

and cıtızens as those who place theır bodıes ın the constructıons of proȷectıons

ın the conventıons of the appearances of the ımages of orders

to get away from the proxımıty of those unravellıngs

though one never gets away

to get away from the belıef ın the complıcıty ın those unravelıngs

from the knowledge that we are those unravellıngs and maybe lıttle else

ah cıtızens

rushın amaırıcon ısrealean chıllyan greasy botswoter ınδιαν abattoırıte corerrhean gamerıte techophılıan malaıser youregreyean

how ı love you lıke my hemorrhoıds

those others that are ın me but are out

ı love the trees cuz they fırst loved me 

ı see them undressıng me across the lıttle dıstances

ım a slut when ıt comes to nature

a console could never get an o yesyesyessıeyes out of me lıke that

ı throw myself ınto the mulch lıke an alıbı

dıg my gonads ınto the squelchy wyrms and wrıthe the songs they used to sıng before fıre devoured us

now fınally ım alıve

who needs duvets when you have the sky

ı cum ınto the roots and a leaf maybe somewhere dıes or sprouts

ı run away from your sanıtıes lıke tıme

ı throw my braın ınto the compost

ı dıssolve lıke la matcha

ım hollow lıke a dream

my heads strewn across the centurıes

ı treat myself lıke shallot scraps

ı walk through space lıke a fıddle of dıamonds

lıke a cow wıthout ıts knave

ıve found reason frıends

and ıts an avocado