8.5.22

deranged tales from a sadoo stoodio


the quaker oats company


galadaps dada wouldnt die   everyone had lost count of the number of times they knew this was the last week and they cast their spells and said their prayers and drank their whisky  each according to its kind  and then   a bra cad a bra   there dadad be  asking for his bit of tortured chicken or bowl of muffets from that secret storehouse of 2391 boxes he had ordered from the quaker oats company after hed received inside info  quite accurate it turned out  that muffets was going to be discontinued globally forever


probably because it doesnt have enough sugar


it doesnt have any sugar


you cant have breakfast without sugar


it didnt keep up with the times


they shouldv added sucrose and made those shredded pucks blue and green and red then they wouldv sold


oh its alright   i got my 2913 boxes   i figure i have to live  at a rate of two muffets a day  till 151 to run out


2391 boxes dada


and thats the way it went


hed fall out of his bed in the night and bang his head and go to emerg and everyone would say well now thats it but a few days later hed be back at home dozing in his chair   his potassium levels would leap and hed be rushed to emerg and everyone would say well now thats surely it but a few days later hed be back at home looking at his unfinished muffet and wondering why the quaker oats company discontinued such a perfect cereal   it wasnt because he didnt like sugar   the muffet would go in the bowl and it would be covered with imprisoned cowmilk and then a quarter cup of golden yellow sugar from the redpath sugar company would get heaped on top and then 4 fluid ounces  though theyre not that fluid  of golden corn syrup from the beehive company which as far as we can tell isnt a company but is a product of  were not sure of this  ach food companies  which in turn is owned we think by associated british foods  which in turn is owned by wittington investments  which in turn is owned by the garfield weston foundation  which makes it sound like a charity  which is more or less owned by a bunch of western weston colonialists  but who can own corn really   dunno  you try googling who owns beehive cornsyrup and see what you get   i mean try another browser and you get the st lawrence starch company  which btw got into a lawsuit with the canada starch company as to which of their brands of corn syrup was fed to the dionne quints and then it seems like st lawrence and probably beehive and maybe the entire river & god knows the quints too got sold to bestfoods which seems somehow to have a sibling named hellmanns and the whole theybang no doubt including a lot of other carcinogenics was sold to cpc international or ingredion or cornproductsrefining or texaco or mazola one or all of which in one of its or their iterations was named the worlds most ethical company which godalmighty cant be true which was sold to unilever which owns a fuckofalot      anyhoo this cornsyrup  only ganesha knows who owns it  would get poured on top of the whole cancerous mess and he fell off a ladder reaching for david copperfield  dickens was the only literature he knew   look were using the pasttense already  dickens and the bible  and some leg infection would blow up his leg to five times the normal size and creep toward his heart and everyone would say well its gotta be time now and a few weeks later hed be watching the birdies from his rocking chair and chuckling to himself birdies look at the birdies the point is we dont recommend you google beehive corn syrup


we should do him in the way trintignant does riva in amour   thats the way its done  thats love


thats murder brumy


murder love whats the diff   trintignant does it


thats in the movies


trintignant was done


thats in the dying


death imitates art


rewilding


how long do you think someone can live on cornsyrup and incarcerated geneticallymodified harrowed chicken


probably til its muffets run out


when ı kick the muffets ıd like to be 81 and sleeping in a hammock on sable island


a cute little horsie nibbling on your gonads


thats the way to bite the lust


old muffetlovers dont die  they just wheat away


oh brumy could you be a sweet dino and get me a bromide martini with nine cherries


& dada doesnt dıe

for dada is forever





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