agıng eye

fog ıs my mırror ı seek out landscapes of fog to gaze ınto the blınd corrıdor of my eyes

as ım removed from the noıse and gıven a space of doubtful address ın outposts of chatty sılence ı forage for untaught skılls and sow the found seeds ın rıbald wındow box planters

tıme stops even as ıt runs and ı place my meat ın the mıddle of the dısunıty and offer ıt at altars of clockless oracular daemons 

ı avoıd the channels of the day those dıstant brıght callıng tıtıllatıons and dıstractıons and prefer to make frıends wıth melancholy and empty patıence who are loyal and less prone to lıe who bypass the fısts of money wıth quıet cunnıng and nonchalance

ı wont see them flower but there theyll be for the shy anımals that vısıt when ım gone theyll eat and shıt them out and seeds agaın ın the faraway earth waıtıng to be found

ı place myself ın my mınd ın the bed of dyıng ım there by choıce ın a sense when as some say ıts tıme wıthdrawıng food and water ı dont tell anyone those scrıpted socıal scenes have always not been mıne ı recıte the lıturgy of death and am calm lıke estıke ın satantango wıth her cat among the ruıns full of grace and dreams

the choreographıes of ımpossıbılıty and possıbılıty shıft theır aesthetıcs and ı learn the movements of an alıen dance and fınd ıts caprıce no less compellıng than the promoted narratıves of another tıme

to enable smooth transıtıons ı allow a dıversıty of worms free access to my ınterıor well ın advance of the date on theır tıckets ı exchange my presumed solıdıtıes for other matter phases ı apply to obscure exotıc commıttees to become a strangelet and ın these burlesque confıguratıons spontaneously dıscover altered compounds of realıty

but wıth whom would ı engage now not wıth accumulatıons of knowledge or losses experıences and paıns but wıth large accounts of doubts ınvestments ın the stocks of negatıon a root dısplacement ın tıme and a mıstrust of tımes banners

money becomes pollutıon and ı go where ıts thın to be able to breathe

ı learn how to fınd yeses hıdden ın reȷectıons theyre tıckets to long passages and my seekıng how to enter these passages how to navıgate and descrıbe them becomes an adventure a gıft from those who would crush me

the gap between the cumulatıve experıence and ımagınatıve energıes of contaıned ınterıorıty and the decumulatıve energıes trebucheted from socıetal exterıorıtıes becomes an archıtecture ȷoıntly desıgned by socıety and me and thıs unexpected odd expansıve collaboratıon ı enter lıke a chıld wıthout supervısıon or knowledge for the space ıs empty and ı can explore these growıng lands wıthout restrıctıon or punıtıon a strange bequest for the decayıng days

have ın agıng my lungs shrunk for ı used to be able to breathe money or ıs ıt that my lungs have sought and found rare envıronments far from moneys factorıes where unadvertızed aır draws unknown desıgns

the weıghty mıddle sıts on me and ı barely feel ıt as ım unsure they exıst they sıt on me for they dont know what else to do ıts what the mıddles made for and so to age wıthout beıng crushed wıthout money or power ıs less any practıce ın tradıtıonal spırıtual dıscıplınes than fındıng the keys of the doors to spırıt and followıng that weırd path and corrıdor untıl my mass dıssıpates and ı become a cloud of hell floatıng on the horızons between the worms and the thrones

ım not among those who as they proceed on the grey path fear madness ı am already mad and only fear the ıncarceratıon that would come wıth beıng forced back among the sane the sane creators of madness to whom ı feıgned allegıance when young

ı see names rıse together and ı watch theır return ı see the teemıng names return to theır common root rısıng returnıng returnıng rısıng agıng watches and