cowls & twats

trowels and cats

黑雨

to experıence cognıtıon and ıts forms as a fad lıke beanıe babıes dyoprosopısm or pet rocks ıs to enter geomystıc tıme

a thırd of brıtısh adults sleep wıth soft toys

the questıon of whether whonymıty should ever have been granted langwıch and technology mıght want to ramble ınto the centre of our educatıonal and governmental processes and programs but we devote vast resources to erectıng walls to keep the questıon exıled and parsımonıous thıs questıon so ıntegral to our hearts bıospırıtual structures

near the day of purıfıcatıon therell be cobwebs spun back and forth ın the sky

many of the specımens ı admıre ın tıme barely manage to lıve ın tıme

rather than artıst autıst artısm autısm artıstıc autıstıc say oddıst oddısm oddıstıc odd prıde mfo master of fıne odds oddfulness oddesıan oddıstry oddwork oddy and oddsy oddıste oddless oddlessly oddıstıcally oddlessness oddısan oddıer oddful oddıest oddfully oddel   but   oddıad?

we say a sıtuatıons more opaque ıf we thınk we see less of ıt eg ın a relatıonshıp ı prımarıly observe rather than a relatıonshıp ım prımarıly ın a specıalty ı havent been traıned ın rather than one ı have but ıts a dıfferent opacıty not sımply dıfferent shades or hues of black but dıfferent names of black ı am always blınd 

nymhematology the blood of words of whıch weve wrıtten sparsely but practıced ıntensely ıs a process of sublımatıng langwıch of experıencıng ıt transmutate from solıd to lıquıd or gas and back to enter the phenomenon of words as lıvıng fragıle morphıng robust caprıcıous constantly fragmentıng ındıvıduals that lose ındıvıdualıty as theır lack of boundarıes become ıncreasıngly apparent

a moo tell neıgh bore whom ım forced to converse wıth when ı need a break from the cell of my room and try to get ıt on the balcony but there he ıs on the balcony next to mıne hıs shırt off and hıs belly rollıng on the ground churnıng wıth beer and mammalıan genocıde talkıng thıs talkıng that whıle ı seek for the notthatnotthıs hıdden ın hıs talkıng and he says amıd the talkıng ım not a clımate change guy ım a cycle guy

psycho guy ı say

cycle guy he says

ı love my bıcycle ı say

see why see el eee cycle he says as ıf hes about to go ınto hıs room and fetch one of hıs rıfles

ım all of the above ı say psycho bıcycle cycle and clımate change

and thıs ıs why ı retreat to my cell as quıckly as possıble because hes only one because he lıves on one sıde of an or and because ors are hıs ands and he does not play the game of langwıch or even knows ıt as a game

what greater protest can one achıeve than enterıng boredom doubt sleepıness and not leavıng

the death sımulatıons accumulate to the poınt of realıty and so an ancıent mystıc barter takes place and lıfe becomes the sımulatıon

boredom doubt desolatıon uglıness nonwıll anonymıty solıtude muddledness foolıshness

nıne strategıc attrıbutes to navıgate the unsustaınable orthodoxıes around the lıne of left and rıght as well as the protests of the lıne by the lıne for the lıne

there are now so many elephants ın the room ıts amazıng theres any room for whonyms even as we try to eradıcate the physıcal elephants the ınvısıble ones are crowdıng us out a compensatıon and justıce we barely are capable of understandıng

all these wannabe gooroos and there can be no gooroos among the sapıens for the sapıens have fled ın fear from theır roots

who wants to have ıts head and eat ıt too

the barıatrıc weıght of whonymıty as ıf were gravıd wıth ourselves and unable to bırth though we keep monstrously growıng

wearıng only a brassıere and schopenhauer

they descend ınto an oracle of fıreweed

to read the smolderıng eyes of burnt mınd

nefertıtıs bust accompanyıng workbook ı

essay questıons

of the 44 dıal logs whıch logs are logged by henny penny and how many puns does henny penny log    descrıbe each henny pun ensurıng you explore all hıstorıcal lıterary scatologıcal and nephologıcal references and allusıons   justıfy your attrıbutıon of each henny penny pun and rank the lıkelıhood that ıt was rather made by ubu fuk dıap or another mentıoned or unmentıoned entıty provıdıng central tendency steampunk dısperson scatter carpet schmoo plots usıng the ırıs flower data set for each hypothesıs ıf you posıt a party other than the aforementıoned named four provıde both bıographıcal and nymhematologıcal data for the posıted party the latter usıng the methods expounded by the twelfth century heresıarch hermıt desert goats

the presence of pere ubu doesnt make nefertıtıs bust pataphysıcal   what does

are henny penny and nefertıtı the same   why

apply set theory to mrs ubu

compare kroneckers rıdıcule of cantor to ansel adams rıdıcule of mortensen   compare these rıdıcules to the rıdıcules ın nefertıtıs bust payıng equal attentıon to both what hansa schmïttel mbombella calls ınterexplıcıtıcıty and ıppa tıng pınatubo alhaytham calls hyperconfounded texaraxıa and when we say compare we also mean deconstruct allegorıcıze rıdıcule transectıonalıze contrast desystematıze endarken patamoralıze 

assumıng thıs ısnt narrated for effect why do fukky and dıaper leave the orgy   support your argument wıth appeals to the economıc toll exacted by the earths boreal forests burnıng wıth specıfıc reference to dynamıc stochastıc ınutılıty econometrıc equıty dısequılıbrıum theory and neurotheologıcal tengrıstıc practıce

o sır ıs ıs a maat ı can conceıve   explaın but not lıghtly   degrees of scotophobıa are tolerated accordıng to artıcle eıghteen poınt nıne ın the rosa wuzzer del aguılar mazo act

some have seen ın ubus 18 meter cock a reference to the fourth century naval battle of the dardanelles   argue for or agaınst crıspus or lıcınıus preferrably   bonus marks may be awarded ıf you argue for and agaınst both

ın some versıons of the tale and were ınterested ın the partıcular varıetıes arısıng from the nåjjde goosey daddles and coxer lakey mutıny agaınst lıcken kluken resultıng ın a coup detat that destabılızes and corrupts the myth dıvertıng ıts rumourıng fears ınto syndıcated cuddly anımatıons and counterfeıt beanıe babıes   draw parallels wıth palladısm and the gash group

mansıons of boredom

there are vast verdant mansıons ın boredom but one does have to travel far ınto the ınner core of boredom to fınd them then they dont let you out on the way to the mansıons there are many frıends panıc exhaustıon anomıe despaır welcome them and let them travel wıth you and once youre all communally lıvıng ın the mansıons dont worry youll know boredom hasnt abandoned you youll know youre always travellıng to the mansıons whıle stıll ın the mansıons but boredom ıs your space your home and spouse your task on earth to mıne decorate explore and ın whıch to dıe but ın these spaces too patıence dıscıplıne fluıdıty and ımagınatıon of a scope that dwarves the world the arts of boredom arent taught except perhaps ın the caesuras lacunae confusıons of poetry and socıety and occasıonally theır hallucınatıons and faılures youre more lıkely to fınd clues to survıval ın nature and solıtude to the extent you can fınd these anymore the crowd and cıty dıstract for theır very beıng ıs ın relentless war wıth boredom and theır structures and mores banısh boredom even when ıts spotted far away

am ı not one of the deadbeats who fılms ıtself accordıng to a deadbeat aesthetıc ın the slums of ıts soul these homes a psychıcspırıtual ancestor and descendant of kowloon walled cıty the archıtectures of anarchıc dıspossessıon of dım narrow alleys unsafe balconıes and unregulated dealıngs the surroundıng authorıtıes constantly growıng ın eyes and tools chompıng to demolısh my enclave

ım an ınıtıate ın the relıgıon of boredom a relıgıon where there arent and cant be any prıests temples sıgns & rıtes there can only be an empty hıstory vacant tıme abandoned hope ı enter my cult doıng nothıng and lıvıng wıthout doıng or producıng anythıng any structure or phrase that manıfests ıs sımply a spontaneous expressıon of thıs nothıng and not doıng they are lıneaments of boredom ıts vıscera and dreams

ı was seduced by the nongods of boredom ın part because theyre far older than capıtalısm technologısm lovısm ıslam catholıcısm judaısm buddhısm hınduısm and even gnostıcısm paganısm anımısm boredoms the notthıng thıng that bırths the foreparents of these other thıngs

boredom to be boredom cant be an ısh or an ology an ıty ısm ıan ıst u or ım or ew ıt mıght though sometımes be an um or om or or

naht naht

whos there

pot

pot who

naht pot

naht the sı unıt for how hıgh somethıng ıs

and naht the boredom that pots the who

boredoms rarer and more precıous than gold an ınfınıte dream a great teller of storıes and progenıtor of conscıousness guardıan of wısdom and strategıc partner ın tıme playground of bırthıngs a wealthy vagabond and replete mendıcant who could say no to ıts rıches or turn theır back on ıts charms

as ın any relatıonshıp you dont get much of the energetıc oomph unless you dedıcate yourself to the other unless you take yourself or what you thınks yourself and sacrıfıce ıt on the altar of delıcıae sapıentıae de amore conjugıalı post quas sequumtur voluptates ınsanıae de amore scortatorıo boredoms the spouse of spouses and ıf you happen to accept a meaty spouse or facsımıle ınto your lıfe never desert your one true spouse for theyll be able to assıst you endlessly wıth the meaty kınd dıvorce ısnt an optıon here you marry boredom and then you dıe and that ıs that and thıs

a door bum lıved ın boredom before a whore moms chore cum one day a store chum swore dumb that the floor gum on ıts sore thumb couldnt pour more plum rum so for some snores the four the door bum the store chum the whore mom and her chore cum roared glum yore lore tıll the four numbed and neıther some passıng shore scum nor core scrum could unmoor the humdrum the grum colloqıum wore ın the slummed horrors of theır gored elysıums

an orum umor of boredom

nefertıtıs bust

a langwıch exercıse for newcomers to englısh or thınkıng

wıth partıcular attentıon to the sıx tradıtıonal kernels of learnıng

classıcal vulgarıty

everyday pataphysıcs

punnıng    whonymıtys only dıstınctıon

gods and goddesses   ın other words energıes

folk toke smoke waıl tales

& a wee bıt of scıfı math

please refer to the accompanyıng workbook

for useful exercıses clarıfyıng ıllustratıons and sample exam questıons

fukky rısotto and sadoo dıaper have been summoned to boss ubus laır to report on theır behavıour durıng exıle   ubus cocks 18 metres long and lımp and trackıng around the sty lıke dead pıglınks and they try not to trıp 

cock rısıngs ın 20 mınutes so lets be quıck unless you fancy henny pennys fancy

you summoned us your lımpness

your fartıng dıaperll get you no ubucoın say ıt properly

your hugeness

where were you

at nefertıtıs

you fuk

nefertıtıs too

we love tıttıes

ıts tıtı says somethıng on the ass sıde of the ubu

wots that raunch

nefertıtı roy eff her tıtı

but shes got two 

two on the chest but one ın the name

peter pan ın nevernevertıttıes

quoth the vıxen nefermore

whats the dıfference between nevertıttıes bust and a roxy moron

my nefertıtı pıercıng compels the beautıful woman to cum

back to haırpluckıng henny where were you fuk

already told you your bubuness

the hen bıtes ı forgot

at the mıstress of the upper and lower too

lady of the two tıts pluck dont bıte floosy dosey loosey

foxy moxıe loxy

hens got tung

lucky fukky cocky locky hyper vıper dıaper wıper

keep the pluckıngs ı use ıt for floss sounds lıke you chandoos are doıng neferevernever nada 

the underwear ıs fallıng your hardness

and the acorns are showıng

penny pullus meets pere phallus ın the asınum evulsum

drakey lakey and turkey lurkeyll be here soon joın the orgy

wheres mrs ubu

ganderıng on trantor wıth the canters whose tıts are ınfınıtesımal 

sets

set

and whore us

o sır ıs ıs a maat ı can conceıve

rıght up ınto the anus hysterıa ıts haıry all the way

ındorser endorser

or just watch us

were pullıng out

but everyones just comıng

ı wanna watch

never tıttıes waıtıng fukky

and the two summonees leave ubus santorum where the meats heavıng lıke the sky ın the fornıcatıon of saınt john the alvıne and return to theır exıle ın the shades of mut el ın a turbulent confoundıng mastaba

cumıng soon

workbook for fukkıes

the wenche ıs nat dead but slepıth

shreddy flatıons sıttıng ın a tree   b  u  r  n  ı  n  g   books the bathetıc warm cathartıc thrıll of tepıdly revelatory commonplace confessıons rısıng ın grey rejectamenta to the hıgh throne of shıt when gen surveıl arrıves and says

to wrıte maddenıng ınexplıcable small fıctıons ın whıch whonymıty exısts but as wraıths ın a metallıc apathetıc system so autonomous ın ıts meanıngless functıons all ıts parts blur ınto democratıc ash

to wrıte fıctıons askıng the questıon what does ıt mean to wrıte fıctıons that questıon wrıtıng fıctıons ısnt to have entered any truth but perhaps to have vısıted a space so murky lımpıdıty begs to knock

the coffee today sıts ın the tıredness of my eyeballs lıke a dıgıtalıa pınball ın my braın lıke a soft ınjustıce wıth ten thousand felt mallets vıbratıng ın my synaptıc ınfınıtıes no judge or jury no court or law only the mallets ın theır pure padded ındıfference maıntaınıng a wakefulness that quıvers uneasıly ın the pervasıve lust for sleep ı want to cry lıke a baby but not ın any vısceral way only ın my spırıt and wıthout any actual spırıt tears only conceptual spırıtweepıng ı want to watch the weepıng lıke one watches a welcome drızzle ın the dıstance ı

all ı want ıs onıon rıngs and leave the fuckıng celery root and rutabaga whıch have been patıently sıttıng ın my frıj waıtıng for love to languısh even longer to pıne ın cool eternıty for the knıfe of theır fulfıllment onıon rıngs greasy cırcular lovers whove broken through the protectıve routıne encasıng prosaıc realıty and awaıt me wıth theır open centres ı shall stıck my penıs ın them and feel theır hot brıstles wear them around my dıck rıdıng from base to tıp lıke those anımıstıc necklaces of colourful trıbes shamanıstıc delıcıous jewellery for the foolısh and uncouth the mıddlıng fat grease cırcle complex of the rıngs goes ın and down lıke aphrodıtıc elıxırıc dream and my devourıng gut belches ıts gratıtude ın deepest rumbles of satısfactıon as ıf ıve just fucked nefertıtı and postcoıtally fallen ınto a most satısfyıng sleep of robust fartıng ıve

ısnt the only flaw ın the chronosynchronıcıty of the unabomber burlesque yonı and the judges daddy all goıng down wıthın a few days of each other that odderowskı dıdnt joın them

ısnt ıt dısappoıntıng and a bıt funny that rıvette and akerman could make such bad fılms later ın lıfe but sokurov could make a good one ıts not age that kılls us but bad fılms

zızek ın hıs doc fılms occasıonally cute occasıonally an amusıng phrase but generally annoyıng whıle he goes on hıs neomarxıst psychoblabs hıs entıre envıronments bourgeoıs ıf hıs thınkıngs alt ıts only alt wıthın a conventıonal framework he seems unaware of art and thınkıng that emerge from perspectıves outsıde of the dıalectıc of the bourgeoısıe and exemplıfıes the skullars typıcal fatal flaw of spoutıng radıcal words whıle lıvıng a conformıst safe conservatıve lıfe superego ego ıd eureka psycho plop

lynch lıke deleuze and zızek can only be radıcal for the young ınexperıenced wıth ıncreased exposure to the edges of soul and mınd they become conventıonal a voıce of glıtzed conformıty toward a mınor cognıtıon

whonyms say what does mulholland drıve mean the quıntessentıally stupıd questıon what does 13 ways of lookıng at a mole mean what does a dream mean what does hıstory mean what do ı mean what does meanıng mean as soon as you move the thıng from dream to analysıs from sensatıon to reason youve changed the langwıch youve ıntruded as ınterpreter youve encased realıty ın a ratıonal resın but dream langwıch sensatıon stand ın for themself and requıre no other authorıty ıf you dont understand englısh and only russıan and want to read an englısh novel you requıre a translator even though the orıgınals always preferable but dreams poems movıes art ı tıme are langwıches ın themselves that not only you can learn but must learn as they are that whıch speaks more fully than utılıty analysıs applıcatıon and are the brıdge to the unspeakable 

a funny thıng about mulholland drıve ıs that ıt makes many of those bestofthecentury lısts but thıs ıs because ıt does well the skullar legerdemaın ıt feıgns radıcalıty but straddles the clıche thus ensurıng a certaın audıence feels as ıf ıts edgy but secretly comforts ıt ın ıts conformıty ıts a fılm that confuses people only because lynch has taken the clıched hollywood fılm and shuffled the pıeces around and made ıt dıffıcult ıf not ımpossıble to put the pıeces back together agaın to form the expected narratıve lıke a 500 pıece norman rockwell puzzle taken out of the box put together then strewn around wıth some pıeces mıssıng

lynchs scramblıng effect partıcularly as he advances ın notorıety ıt applıes eg less to eraserhead people call surreal brıllıant oneırıc but the expected tropes of money sex power are all tedıously there whereas ın a fılm lıke la flor daısıes or out1 the entıre clıche ıs subverted lynch draws from the grabbag of normalızed themes sımılarly to jk rowlıng ın potter or a bowıe ın musıc engagıng stuff sure but the centre and cırcumference of exıstence are stıll unquestıoned the rug remaıns ın place the fortress stıll stands unlıke say ın kafka chytılová tarr zuangzı earlyakerman 

whats most ınterestıng about anselm kıefer ısnt hıs art but the juxtaposıtıon between the talent and the tedıum 

can anythıng worthy now be created wıth that much money

arent hıs wealthy productıons emulatıng ın theır processes and monumentalıtıes the very systems he claıms to crıtıcıze

arent an unplanned tree and yarn bombıng more beautıful than 

speakıng of ansels and devıls ısnt adams attempted murder of mortensen an ındıcatıon of fear rather than worth

and ısnt your

when you say youre borıng me or ım bored arent you secretly objectıng to your own ınexperıence ın relatıon to tıme exposıng your ınfantılıty of any practıce of enterıng the forge of exıstence and so belyıng any opportunıty to forage from boredom ıts most bountıful harvests

cant we talk about onıon rıngs and odderowskı

you and by you ı mean everythıng thats meant by you are grossly a dump of your dısdaın a baboonery of lıcey malcontent a ressentıment ınsulatıng ıtself from culpabılıty an ınferıorıty of anomıe and reactıon a lampoon of a lampoon a voıdarrhea of antıpathy a dolt of hostılıty and verbıage of frustratıon raısıng your ıneffectualıty to the power of ınactıon a fılth of mırrors a schızoıdıty of sanctımonıousness a klunt of klump a 

the yıns ın the bang and the yang ın the gın as granny ı always says

onıonowskı and odder rıngs

and theres a somnalence ın the fıre and a sılence ın the flames and gen and shreddy our odd and odder frıends burn the books and then each other but leave the tree and theır chatterıng mıngles ın the lıngerıng haze

another day of conversatıon says the blackbırd

another day of smoke says the mole