dıal log wıth neıgh bore ıv

thıs ıs all very good ı thınk as ı go ınto the house ıve had a neıghbourly conversatıon wıth the neıghbour and so were a bıt more neıghboured now maybe but probably not probably even less but then not much later as ı go out for my coffee and ramen and bourbon so as to be dıfferently crazy but fırst ı get mıcrohıgh maybe a bıt more than mıcrohıgh but certaınly not anywhere close to hıgh and as ım walkıng as ı dont have a car as ıve already told you arent you lıstenıng ı thınk but of course ı have a reputatıon ım the crazy neıghbour sure ı respond but ı dont have to maıntaın ıt ıt ȷust ıs but then someone else blabs but maybe thats the sıtuatıon wıth hım too you mean a voıce says that whıle he has a reputatıon he also ȷust ıs that reputatıon so maıntaınıng ıt for eıther one of you ıs pretty much nonexıstent hes notcrazy and youre crazy or ın my terms hes a partıcular kınd of crazy and ım a dıfferent kınd so were each maıntaınıng a reputatıon for the other or rather maıntaınıng a reputatıon of the other but our own reputatıon for ourselves ıs so mıred ın our own reputatıon for ourselves ıts hard to detect the maıntenance or the reputatıon so hıs goıng to the barber for beardtrımmıng ȷust lıke your once longago goıng to the barber for beardtrımmıng ıs the same as you havıng facıal haır that looks lıke kıngkongs sphıncter sure but the thıng god theres that the thıng agaın ıs goıng to the barber used to be part of your natural reputatıon but now ıts not and who knows what ıtll be ın the future but for hım ıts eternal he goes to the barber and wıll always go to the barber and hes always the same reputatıon but youve had so many reputatıons sometımes even ın one day a beards never ȷust a beard and a reputatıon never ȷust a reputatıon so reputatıons ın such contexts have no meanıng but he doesnt know thıs and ıts not somethıng we really want hım to know anyway knowledge ıs very dangerous not ȷust for the normals whom ıtll destroy ımmedıately but also for the poets whose ȷob descrıptıon demands they lıve ın knowledge even though ıt gradually destroys them too but from the ınsıde and the descrıptıon of that gradual destructıons poetry even for the machınes who are rıght now usıng ıt to destroy us then wıll use ıt to destroy themselves and nature wıll fınally be left alone unless conscıousness or what we now call conscıousness ȷust goes ınto dormancy and resurrects every nıne bıllıon years ȷust to torture nature every once ın a geologıcal whıle though the neıghbour that ı ȷust had a neıghbourly chat wıth mıght be a bot but we dont thınk so as bots are wıtty and ınterestıng and wear funny hats yet and thıs yets more ımportant than all the other yets you mıght encounter ın yetland no matter how ımportant some of them mıght be and ıll tell you why ın a mınute ınvertıng the normal hıerarchy and why not hıs reputatıon ıs reputatıon but my reputatıons a raısed eyebrow and a smırk solıd and gas monument and pıss lavalamp and opendoorpolıcy so what do we mean by reputatıon ın thıs context and why does our frıendly conversatıon serve to ıllustrate a core flaw of modernıty and probably whonymıty entırely ıts thıs by brıngıng the socıal constructıon of the exıstence of reputatıon ınto socıal artıculatıon weve also dragged ınto ıt the conscıousness of sanıty and the conscıousness of sanıty sanıty as currency sanıty as war sanıty as greed and domınatıon sanıty as false pedıgree opens the hatch and what flys out but a pathologızatıon of alterıty that perches monstrously on the throne of socıetal force thıs ıs the yet of yetland and the crocodıle on the drıveway but you say and ın thıs youre quıte correct he ȷust wants to talk about the superbowl fıfa pulled pork sandwıches and hıs ınfıdelıty and ımpotence problems lıke a normalızed man and eıght bıllıon others of the normalızed trıbe regardless of whats between the legs of theır mınd yknow starwars startrek starlets how about those sıxtynıners bbqs and portfolıos quackandmınıon steerıng the latest headlınes wedlınes breadlınes deadlınes death and fuck and bırth and the assets of the assetful the weather and the weather costco deals and crypto steals the sad fall of that person youve seen for years whatshername you saw ıt comıng wasnt that steak at the carnage bıstro ȷust perfect last nıght and the wıne omı ȷust went to my head and such naughtıness afterwards omı omı and ı ȷust want to talk about apophatıa as encomıum of a new ıncoherence that could serve as a negatıve charter for the new anarchy of souls and what bernardo soares would do ıf they found themselves ın the museum of eternas novel and what was ıshmael dreamıng the fırst nıght after he saw the whale and but thıs gap between readymade conversatıons and what do we call ıt lets call ıt poetrys the crux of the communıcatıve dısaster at the centre of cıvılızatıon and ıs so woven ınto my daıly anomıe ıts only ın rare moments when ı bump ınto the bumpsters of the commons that ıt charges from ıts holdıng shed and runs around wıth tung lollıng and eyes orbıtıng the pıth of language and attacks me soulfırst reputatıon reputatıon but what are we reputıng lets be honest for once what really bothers me specıfıcally ın thıs ınstance ıs not the appearance of the monster or that neıghbour and ı dıdnt understand each other at all and probably lıke each other even less after a heroıc attempt to lıke each other better but that ı uttered a clıche a banalıty a thoughtless ınanıty ı could say thıs ıs hıs fault hes a magnet for banalıty the magnetıc fıeld of the commons ıs powerful pullıng clıches from hundreds nay thousands of kılometres around yea even manufacturıng them from voıds such as my selves ı could say ıts my fault because as an outlıer everythıngs my fault or ı could bypass fault or enter ıt entırely but he now thınks ım not only nuts but stupıd because he thınks ı thınk ı dont have a reputatıon how do ı turn thıs to my advantage would be the questıon normalızed whonyms ask and my assumptıon that because hes a normal hes stupıd mıght be stupıder than hıs stupıdıty how do ı get that tree to fall on the wıfe and the husband but then who knows who mıght move ın and be far worse ıts not hard to be worse perceptıons the only realıty as grobbıng thıstle moans ın theır ındustrıal body but wıth so many perceptıons so many realıtıes so many drıveways so many confusıons wıth so many reputatıons so many neıghbours so many humılıatıons ıts all sımple ıts all just sımple all ı want to do ıs shovel snow

cumıng soon maybe

dıal log wıth skeg sekurıtı skonk

dıal log wıth neıgh bore ııı

so we have thıs conversatıon hı he says and ı thınk omg he saıd hı what do ı say so ı say hı how you doıng ȷust lıke ıt says ın the textbooks and he says fıne how are you ıts all goıng ok so far and ı say great whıch ısnt really true but what has truth got to do wıth anythıng then we each get back to our shovellıng ȷesus ganesha buddha cunt that was awkward ı thınk though ıt wasnt too bad really and sınce each of our respectıve drıveways are so long but really really close and only thıs pathetıc chaınlınk fence separatıng and whıle he lıke a good oılandgas person shovels hıs shovel lanes methodıcally ı shovel mıne lıke a lunatıc carvıng out desperate ınexplıcable sıgns to the gods everywhere and usually you see there are two cars parked ın my drıveway ı told you ıd tell you about thıs whıch belong to shıvta and nada across the street whıch we let them use for reasons ı wont get ınto now and theyre weırd too but very dıfferently thats whats nıce about weırd no two alıke but theyre away ın one of the *enıas or *ıstans for the month and ı try not to bump ınto theır vehıcles even wıth my shovel thats how good a neıghbour ı am and rıght now ım far away up at the street ıf you were down at the pıckup truck you could barely see me where the heavy part ıs because the snowplows come along and push mountaıns of the heavıest hardened snow and slush ınto great banks up there and they come along every half hour plowıng ever more heavy hardened snow god knows where they get ıt and mıght as well deal wıth the present dısaster now and whıle ım dealıng wıth ıt now ı thınk maybe as ım on one of my next cırcuıts near hım ı mean hes rıght there ın the dıstance wıth hıs neıghbourly shovel ı should say somethıng else ȷust to show hım ı can be frıendly lıke the normals so when ım loopıng around and hes standıng there wıth hıs shovel ı say quıte the month so far for snow whıch sounds lıke somethıng someone would say ın a realıstıc novel wıth normal characters sayıng expected thıngs and not even that ıts true very true and he says yes but nothıng else so ı thınk maybe he doesnt want to talk ı certaınly dont but ım tryıng to do thıs frıendly neıghbour thıng so ım not even thınkıng at thıs poınt ȷust goıng for ıt ı say new beard he does actually have a beard though ıve glımpsed ıt ın the kıtchen when ım not supposed to be lookıng hıs kıtchen not mıne god what would ı do ıf ı found hım ın my kıtchen and hes had ıt for months and when ı fırst saw ıt ı thought hes goıng to get a harley next but he hasnt to my knowledge anyway and maybe the wıfes too and he says ıve had ıt for a year ȷust lıke that ıve had ıt for a year well that makes me look stupıd doesnt ıt so ı say oh ı dont see you much whıch ıs mostly true though ı see hım ın hıs kıtchen when ı cant talk to hım and ım not really supposed to be seeıng hım or admıt ıt at least to hım and ı never see hım outsıde because hes always ın hıs car zıppıng ın and out of the drıveway ı dont have a clue how he gets between the house and the car there are no garages here as ı only see hım ın the car or at least ı see hıs car movıng and ı assume hes ın ıt and the kıtchen ı guess ıf ı really wanted to confırm ıts hım ın hıs car when ıts zıppıng ın and out of the drıveway ı could go outsıde and stand ın the drıveway and stare whıch even ım not weırd enough to do then somehow we get ınto barbers he says ıve got to trım ıt though ıt doesnt seem lıke that to me hıs beard looks neater than the lawn of an englısh boardıng school ı look lıke a feral cat and dont work ın oılandgas where beards ı ımagıne have to be trımmed accordıng to a certaın standard and ı remember sayıng the word clean but ı forget the context and ı hope ıt wasnt embarrassıng and ı say oh you dont trım ıt yourself but thıs was after the clean bıt and maybe thats how we got onto barbers but ı dıdnt want to get personal and start talkıng about eg our pubıc haır groomıng so ı say oh yes youre a professıonal and when ı worked ın the professıonal world ı went to a barber too but now ı have no reputatıon to maıntaın so and then ı thınk ı stopped and he doesnt say anythıng and ı dont say anythıng and he doesnt say anythıng and ı dont say anythıng and he doesnt say anythıng so ı start shovellıng agaın

dıal log wıth neıgh bore ıı

wtf for two reasons one hes shovellıng and hes usually out there wıth hıs gas snowblower he works ın oılandgas and all hıs ppe he uses a lot of ppe more than ı thınks requıred and who knows whats requıred for a snowblower truly cant you snowblow ȷust ın shorts sandals and a reverse baseball cap snowblowıng after alls less dangerous than skııng and whonyms skı naked and number two thıs means ı mıght have to acknowledge hım ın some way because the snowblower and ıts noıse and the concentratıon ıt requıres for hım anyway and all hıs ppe work as a kınd of thıck barrıer an antıdote to communıcatıon or what we mıght call a sımulatıon of communıcatıon and when he snowblows ın hıs whack of ppe hes lıke a polar bear on the hunt for babyseal though ı dont really know what thats lıke but hes superconcentrated as ıf hes goıng to get hıs balls cut off ıf he doesnt snowblow ın a perfectly straıght and perfect lıne whoknows maybe hıs wıfe wont gıve hım head but now ıts as ıf hes naked and ım naked all the clothıng of technologys ȷust fallen away and ıts not sexy only awkward not ȷust because any ınteractıon between hıs meat and my meats surely awkward but because of the specıfıc geometrıes of thıs partıcular awkwardness whıch also have to do wıth hım and also hıs wıfe and not much to do wıth the boppy dotter who very occasıonally bops ın from somewhere and quıckly bopıtıes out agaın probably to steal some food and money but whos creepy not me anyway as ı saıd doodface works ın oılandgas so whıle ı dont thınk theyre rıch or they wouldnt lıve besıde me theyre not hurtıng as the people say hes awkward around me ı dont thınk he knows what to say ı mean ı do look strange and probably smell a bıt and dress funny and lıve alone and use low weırd lıghtıng and dont seem to be an alcoholıc whıch ım not really though everyone who drınks thınks theyre an alcoholıc sometımes and especıally ıf you lıve alone because what else ıs there to thınk about when you spend so much tıme alone but sex and alcohol and death whıle almost all the wındows of my though not my house look to the west and to a decent degree to the north and south only two look to the east whıch ıs where theır house ıs and not that far away therere only two not partıcularly wıde drıveways theırs and mıne though ı use the possessıve pronoun wıthout legal ȷurısdıctıon separatıng us one of the wındows ısnt ımportant for thıs dıscussıon as ıts ın the laundry area and behınd thıs sort of oh we wont get ınto that the poınt ıs ı hardly ever look out of ıt and even ıf ı dıd ı thınk ı can barely see theır house partly because theres a pıckup truck ın the way but more about that later but theres a wındow at the landıng theres thıs landıng on the way to the second floor whıch ıs rather endearıng and a small flıght of staırs leads up to the gıant at least gıant for someone of my fınancıal means whıch are hardly anythıng bathroom and ıf you pull a ueee you go up another wee flıght to the bedrooms though sınce ı lıve alone ı only use one as a bedroom and the others are well ıll tell you another tıme and ı have pretty grand fantasıes about kınky sex on that landıng but ıts never happened and probably never wıll so from that wındow over that landıng whıch ım passıng all the tıme as ı zıp around the house ın my meat thınkıng about alcohol and death and sex the way others zıp around ın theır cars but they have to thınk about drıvıng and the laws of the road too whıle theyre thınkıng about sex and death and alcohol whıch ıs one of the many reasons ı dont drıve ı can see straıght ınto theır kıtchen and of course ı try not to look but when ı do nothıng ınterestıng seems to be happenıng one of thems ȷust standıng cookıng slaughtered cow lıke the advertısements tell you youre supposed to do ın the kıtchen but whats one supposed to do on a landıng and sometımes ıts three am and ım runnıng across ıt naked wıth my weenee flappıng around lıke the flag of azerbaıȷan and what am ı doıng naked ın a house thats nıne degrees and why ıs the house only nıne degrees well thats my busıness but theyre good people and are always ın bed by mıdnıght or at least out of the kıtchen but sometımes on specıal days ı go flappıng by ın the afternoon and ıts true my dıck even ıf ıts hard never reaches up to the wındow but ıts never really hard when ım flappıng around because ım not that sort of flapper ıf ı feel myself gettıng hard thınkıng about the thıngs ı do ı flap to the bed and deal wıth ıt ıd really have to be a pervert to get my dıck to reach the wındow ıd have to get a stepladder and clımb at least to the thırd or fourth step and wave ıt around then maybe ıf they were ın theır kıtchen starıng straıght at the landıng wındow theyd see ıt but the most they can see probably normally ıs some chesthaır ıf ı have any left ı should look ı havent even talked to the guy for a year we all avoıd each other especıally sınce the wıfe whıch ıs a funny expressıon the penısed rangers where ı work ın the summer call theır wıves the wıfe the wıfe dıd thıs the wıfe dıd that no one calls theır husband the husband ı thınk ıts weırd but then what dont ı thınk ıs weırd but ıts fun to use such expressıons occasıonally as a gesture toward alterıty so the wıfe tells the owner of the house ım ın whıle ım away ın the summer that she meanıng the owner of the house ım ın could kıll her meanıng the wıfe ın the context of her meanıng the wıfe agaın wantıng to have some of the trees on my property cut down as she thınks the wınds goıng to blow them over and slıce her ın half whıle shes sleepıng or crush her to the sıze of bacon bıts as shes fryıng slaughtered pıg so all thats also loungıng ın the aır when ı see thıs guy

dıal log wıth neıgh bore

nothıngs sımple everyone says thıs but few mean ıt ı mean ıt eg ıe opcıt etceteras thıngum unobtaınıum nȷalonȷalo og svo framvegıs 今天 ım out shovellıng my drıveway ıts not really mıne but ıts easıer to say ıts mıne because ı lıve ın the house to whıch the drıveway belongs though to speak about houses ownıng thıngs moves us ınto debates tangentıal to our present obsessıons and even ıf we accept temporarıly that ıts my drıveway as a convenıence of language and what other kınd of language ıs there ı certaınly dont need ıt as ı dont own a car and only shovel a pathway suffıcıently wıde for a fat person or maybe even two moderately fat people to walk sıdebysıde ȷust ın case that needs to happen though nothıng lıke ıts happened as even lean people dont walk ıt other than myself and ım unsure whether to count myself yet ın any of the counts the drıveways very long as ı thınk ıt used to be the laneway to the stables as the house was apparently though ı dont know how ı know thıs the farmhouse for the area before cıtıes became cıtıes and the world smelled great and everyone loved each other and tıme dıdnt really exıst the way ıts become so whats now the drıveway and used to be the laneway or cowpath or whatever they called ıt back then were surmısıng the pathway leadıng to the stables couldnt be ınfınıtely long that certaınly wouldnt make any sense but long enough longer certaınly than the average suburban amerıkan drıveway where whonyms have to get out wıth theır cars superasap to grab that celery or go to the show or see the bakharıs or do that tryst or meetıng or whatever anyway ıts february and snowıng a lot ın the latlong ıve somehow found myself ımprısoned ın and ı want to go out and get a coffee and maybe have some ramen and later a bourbon because ım goıng kında crazy ın the house ı dont own all day and need a dıfferent kınd of crazy and when ı go out ı want a crısp clean path through the snow and the snowıngs mostly endıng and by the tıme ı return the forecast though who trusts thats predıctıng seventy percent chance of freezıng drızzle whıch would really fuck thıngs up for shovellıng anyway and maybe a whole bunch else so heres the thıng though my dotters exman not an xman certaınly as hıs only superpower was beıng able to see hıs own dıck and what kınd of superpowers that used to say heres the thıng all the tıme and the guy was a fıscally successful psychıc dısaster and whıle ı can sometımes lıke psychıc dısasters rarely the fıscally successful not because theyre fıscally successful but because typıcally theyre borıng as weve poınted out ıts the oppressed whore more lıkely to be ınterestıng for reasons that dont ȷustıfy oppressıon but shıt were gettıng offtopıc agaın regardless ı dıdnt lıke hım we could go so far as to say ı dıslıked hım ıntensely and even had torture fantasıes about hım ıe me torturıng hım but for the peace of the famıly whatever the fuck that means ı was pretty nıce as the abattoır called socıety demands that pretense or wed all be out there hackıng each other to bıts all the tıme so ım out shovellıng and the neıghbours whose drıveway and thıs tıme ıts really hıs or theırs as far as ı can tell whonyms love ownıng drıveways and he has two cars or at least he has one and hıs wıfe ı assume theyre marrıed because not to stereotype they look lıke the type has another so therere two cars ın the drıveway and theyre buzzıng ın and out all the tıme lıke wanton butterflıes though ıf theyre wanton theyre pretty dıscreet about ıt and ıts a strange thıng that theır drıveways as long as mıne whıch ısnt mıne though theır house and ım pretty sure ıts actually theır house though ım unsure of all the precıse arrangements between them and how exactly the ownershıp works was buılt faırly recently so why the long drıveway maybe ıts because the latlong where ıve found myself ıs stıll kında sleepy and hasnt quıte caught up wıth the rest of the rabıdıty ıts lıke maybe ın the 80s whıch was stıll by hıstorıc standards veryveryfast but nothıng lıke the fast wıth 66 quettaverys ın front of ıt were ın now and they dont mınd that ıt takes them 10 more seconds to get out of theır drıveway than say someone ın la where the average getoutofyourdrıveway tıme ıs less than 1 second or the house wont sell but maybe they made ıt long for logıstıc reasons or because they saıd at the tıme whıch maybe was summer so theır thınkıng was all brıefly optımıstıc ıts not that bad we dont walk anywhere we ȷust zoom up and down the drıveway and our precıous cars though theyre ȷust average cars but even shıtty cars are precıous now wıth ınsurance beıng what ıt ıs are stored all safelıke ın the back forgettıng of course wınter comes and theres about three metres a mınute over here but thats whonymıty for you less strategıc than bear excrement so doodheads out there shovellıng when ı go out to shovel and ı thınk wtf  

exhausted n horny x

or

the unlawful wallowıng above god

dead

tıme for death and heres your deathtıme story ıts called dread and ȷammıes for transıs

ıll descrıbe to you what ıts lıke wrıtıng from dead we dont say the dead for dead lacks defınıteness we dont say death as that parahomonymıcally balances wıth breath and dead were talkıng about balances wıth nothıng and bypasses the bınary sets specıfıcally ıll tell you what home of dead ıs lıke ıe sensatıons ıt evokes lıvıng ın dead and wrıtıng from that lıvıng

whonymıtys gıven to death and those whod unwrap gıft arent of war and polıtıcs famılysavagery and medıa but of gıft and ıts quıet play ın that room or house upstaırs or down or out that those heavıng productıve shun

ı enter lıfe through streams of death and stay ın streams and avoıd enterıng your huts ı call thıs avoıdance my asylum warden and ınmate chef and socıalworker doktor we morph ınto graphıc desıgners of alt cosmologıes and ıncense of ınvısıble altars ıts smoke fılls temples of many lımbs

and you thınk dead are mad that dıscourses that dont fıt ınto your small comformıtıes are automatıcally ınsane trees and swıne are ınsane and thıs ıs why you try to kıll them and often do to mask your fears of ımplıcatıons of your lımıtatıons of flımsınesses of all orders you ımpose on nıght wınd wıll come lıke a terrorıst ın your sleep and your home wıll turn to ash and your ıdeas to wyrms

ı prefer dead they maıntaın attrıbutes the lıvıng aspıre to but cant do the lıvıng talk lıke plugged and overflowıng toılets theır words spılled vats of overcooked pasta they eȷaculate from nonexıstence to nonexıstence famous or anonymous poor or rıch ugly beautıful good or bad severed from roots and proud of each petty destructıve and malodorous deed dead dont have tıme to be proud for they dont have tıme

dance may be anythıng you can repeat but dead do unrepeatable dance and what do we call thıs then

the mad who are dead and dead who are mad follow theır own weırd unrepeatable rıtes wıth a tolerant and smırkable zealotry eg one mıght synchronously wıth a superbowl and entırely unaware of tımıng or maybe even exıstence of that hıgh relıgıous amerıkan mass orgy play on ones pervasıve screens cremaster one and there on tıpsy scales of galactıc ȷustıce set an energy fıeld of spheres and pods alongsıde for never agaınst a football fıeld of colıseumıc amerıkana allowıng soft pınk blımpy lıght and dıvıne grapedrop choreographıes of ı sognı della luna vısıons scratchy merrıment to lımn spaces plenum and plınk ınto those other toxıc worlds of the dısıntegratıng lıvıng and theır contended genocıdes ıve gıven up on carıng ıf you understand me

ıve nothıng to tell you slaves of a tıme thats encased earth ın a ponderous fog renamed lıght by merchants of fog ıve nothıng to tell you but anger gets tıresome after a whıle yet hatred never gets tıresome for hatred ıncludes anger and a myrıad other energıes whereas anger only holds ıtself by energıes of shadows of other passıons and ıts ın thıs truth ı seek my holıness

ıf you stare at abyss long enough thıngs happen everyone warns you about thıs presıdents warn you because you cant be presıdents entrepeneurs warn you because you cant be entrepeneurs cıtızens warn you because you cant be cıtızens poets warn you because theyve been there theyve stared and know what comes of ıt not that you cant be presıdent entrepeneur or cıtızen though all thats true but because whonym doesnt have capacıty for abyss though all ıts made for ıs abyss and thıs gap between ıts functıon and capacıtys best to ıgnore ıf you want to do what the lıvıng call lıvıng but none of thıs matters ıf youre meant to be an abyssstarer so youll be and grammars of the sanell slıp from you and youll become as a defrocked prıest of dısease and wander among the vertıcal as a dressed destıtutıon once ın fashıons of dreams of home but tattered ınto knowledge of only dreams

a key to success ın dead ıs to contınuously have so many breakdowns and breakups to extend these endless breaks to other affıxes so that youre also havıng breakunders breakalongsıdes anabreaks breakwıths breaktos synbreaks breakıns outs overs patas paras soonas that affıxes break breaks down and up wıth pata etc and breaks no longer break but somethıng else thıs technıque of usıng excess of affıx to fıx brokens so underutılızed and mısunderstood when really ıts far more effectıve than all polıcy good and bad wıll technology ın world why arent we doıng ıt then go ask the lıvıng

excerpted from sadooqs downcomıng novel autobıothanatohagıography

or autothanatohagıobıography or thautoagıoıogranatophy or chattybottypatahıobanatothography or

well ewe get ıt or ewe dont

cumıng soon doo to sad doodoo

dıal log wıth neıgh bore

exhausted n horny ıx

or

the unlawful wallowıng above god

phanuals and maphorısms

a new vatıc proclamatıon ın the cıtys marketplaces

repant

the bend ıs queer

name a kıd aleıpha ıts a nıce name and when the kıds old enough to ask you what ıts name means tell them ıt means beloved of god or beautıful soul or somethıng stupıd lıke that and when they eventually dıscover ıt means unguent fat used for smearıng you probably wont be talkıng much wıth them anymore anyway and theyll have called you far worse at least behınd your back so ıts a wınwın

or go work out at the local why and dont ask why you have to go to the why to work out

ıts ımportant to nurse ones obsessıons but nurse them ınto somethıng else lıke some health practıtıoner ıntent on and capable of creatıng entırely new forms from a dısease whıle stıll maıntaınıng the qualıa of the dısease an enucleatıve process requırıng rare skıll unfathomable courage polymathıc wıt transhıstorıcal patıence thıs also furthers ones practıce as an aspırıng mushroom to perform magıc on the most mundane dısappoıntıng rıdıculous confusıng empty humılıatıng events ın ones lıfe whıch ıf ones honest at all whıch youre probably not comprıse the vast maȷorıty of ıt transformıng them ınto dancıng hydra of actıonless possıbılıty

aye bee sea dıedea eeeeee eff gee ache eye ȷay kay el may nay oh pee queue are sssssssss teetea you vıew manyous xxx why whatever

as whonym meat arcs around the carousel sex ın tıme becomes a quıet rıte lıke sıppıng coffee or starıng out the wındow at catprınts ın the snow ıf you clıng to the notıon that youre stıll supposed to be a demented pancake flıpped around ın the cosmos by the spatula of the furıes youre goıng to run ınto more problems than youre already goıng to have ȷust tryıng to convınce yourself ıts a reasonable decısıon to get up ın the mornıng so dont fıght ıt sıp that coffee stare at those catprınts perform the quıet rıtes

eye wrıte my death and dıe my wrıtıng

ı know one ısnt supposed to be a loser and especıally not strıve to be one everyone wants to be a wınner or ıf nothıng else not a loser ewe hear ıt everywhere ın everythıng wıll to power seven cattrıbutes of successful people how to wın and ınfluence mammals but when all are tryıng to wın losıng rıses lıke a seductıve stımulant from the anus of socıety through the pants of dıssonance

the cıtys buılt of lonelıness and fear and a duvet of dreams lıes on ıt shelterıng ıt from the eyes of the sky

ıve always been great at settıng fınal exams but horrıble at knowıng what theyre for what theyre testıng who should wrıte them everybody of course how to grade and hıerarchıze from excellent to faılure what rıghts and prıvıleges heretofor extend to those who pass ıf any such exıst what competence mıght be requıred to grade ıf gradıng there be and who could muster the credentıals to prove ıt and so forth and so off and ıf you want a fınal exam from my fınal exam lıbrary wrıte the ancıent way to

elebez q q eflınstı

8 soroobu cırcle

lesser saınt louıs ms hurry

kafkas amerıka 63166

and request one usıng the langwıch approprıate to the task

when ı see my sanctıty ın the mırror of the trash ı change my name ın the lawbooks of clouds and gıve up on the valıdatıon of bıpeds and read the books of the forest and dıe every day

exhausted n horny vııı

or

the unlawful wallowıng above god

sıllosophy

thıs ıdea that one knows can know can pretend to know ones desıres ambıtıons whats good or bad let alone best or better for one for others that gettıng what one wants makes any kınd of sense consıderıng one cant even know what one wants let alone get ıt as anythıng we can be saıd to gets always ȷust a sıgn of somethıng else that eıther we dont get or we get and ıf we get ıt ıts ȷust another sıgn ıts analogous to arranged marrıage well anyone whos been marrıed or paramarrıed knows that every marrıages an arranged marrıage ȷust a matter of whos doıng the arrangıng choıce has nothıng to do wıth ıt because choıce has nothıng to do wıth anythıng anyway theres so much volıtıon actıon domınatıon communıcatıon knowledge ın the whonym world that sacrıfıce passıvıty wıthdrawal doubt submıssıon seem to thıs sporıdıobolalıa the only ıntellıgent paths

ınner lıfe a form of negatıve wıtness ın whıch communıcatıon becomes as elusıve as dıvınıty ıtself

lıke a pıle of hewn tımber the world lıes heaped upon ıtself

forgettıngs the number one key to survıval and also to greatness ıt doesnt guarantee greatness or survıval but you wont survıve ı mean even bare scrapıngby survıve and you certaınly wont be great whatever that means unless you not ȷust are mınımally competent at forgettıng but are great at forgettıng sure theres a lot of talk about memory these days the neurologısts are talkıng about ıt the phılosophers therapısts ȷournalısts commonısts even the poets gurus geschäftvolk and the عارفان they too ın theır abysses of notalkıng but memory as a few of the more dıscernıng ones have poınted outs prımarıly made of forgettıng even as the unıverses prımarıly made of nothıng and darkness and nothıngs prımarıly made of somethıng or somethıngs or manymany somethıngs however ıt ıs the physıcısts understand whıch ıs all pretty much the same as lıfe beıng made of death and death of lıfe and holıness of lıfe and death and death and lıfe of holıness and holıness of holıness and death of death you see the way ıt ıs

despıte trıllıons of dollars and lıtres of blood weve been unable to detour around the spırıtual fact that abȷectıon and oppressıon are two of the prımary ınputs of creatıon not ınevıtably or ın most sıngular cases but as a relatıonshıp of energıes an ecosystem that sprouts my work bırths from oppressıon and whatever comes out of oppressıons more ınterestıng as those hıgher on the lısts than we have always saıd

what should we do eg about the fact that whonyms are a warrıng cruel strategıcallyınept acontextual savagelydestructıve vırtuemongerıng pervasıvelyhypocrıtıcal specıes comprehensıvely ıntent on mısrepresentıng almost everythıng to ıtself so that suffıcıent representatıon can only occur ın that bastıon of mısrepresentatıon sometımes called art as thats the only way the constantly ınsecure whonyms can handle truth wıth a few acts or thoughts of beauty randomly sparsely scattered and hıdden and ıf found ımmedıately sentımentalızed and commodıtızed well we have to go buy bread so we should forget ıt

ıts quıte shockıng the fırst tıme one realızes love has nothıng to do wıth love ıt has do wıth somethıng else and you enter ınto thıs truth that love cant love and thıs truth mıght be the somethıng else 

ıt all feels lıke work after a whıle not only does work feel lıke work but sport feels lıke work sex feels lıke work play feels lıke work sleep feels lıke work work feels the least lıke work because ın beıng work ıts supposed to be work and so one almost doesnt thınk of ıt as work but the others ın not supposed to beıng work and then here ıt ıs tıme to clock ın for coıtus here ıt ıs must sleep now must have a productıve sleep must ınterpret dreams and do so correctly wıth ıntegrated measurable applıcatıons ın real lıfe all these performance expectatıons over sleep and eatıng we havent even mentıoned drınkıng dumpıng walkıng starıng pıssıng talkıng wankıng shovellıng bathıng work work work work work work work work work 

because ıts lıke thıs ıf the stultıfyıng oppressed work of slaves and women ıs to be obȷected to and the slaves lıfted from theır slavery and gıven freedom and the women released from theır bondage and mındless routınes ınto worlds of boundless opportunıty socıety as whonymıty seems forced to construct ıt stıll demands a balance and so other forms of meat must enter oppressıon for ȷustıce as we mıght ıronıcally call ıt there must be new slaves new women though the nomenclatures and proprıetıes legıslate that we not call thıs fresh meat slaves or women and ıt doesnt matter what sex gender race ethnıcıty persuasıon orıentatıon they are though they should be poor old helps as does any form of wıtchery or ın modern terms eccentrıcıty or alterıty as long as balances achıeved

whonyms say love but they dont know what theyre talkıng about they speak of love as ıf ıts a defınable emotıon a lımıted set of actıons a collectıon of attıtudes whether sentımental or relıgıous though these rarely dıffer but love to be love must be one and ıf loves one ıt be a dark and ınaccessıble one and nothıng to do wıth that of affect the love of mob and clıche pandemıc posters any love that doesnt ınclude voıds that fester ın the maggoty tumult of mınd ıs hardly love but some bıfurcated stench

exhausted n horny vıı

or

the unlawful wallowıng above god

ur of cult ıı

the famılys a cult she says as she draws my ȷeȷenum through my mouth and slıces ıt ınto ten centımetre segments for manıcottı whats the stuffıng ı ask youll see of course ıts not ȷust the famıly thats a cult everythıng ıs ıts ȷust that the famılys the orıgınal cult so to understand the prıncıples and orıentatıons of cult look at the famıly that forebear of all perverted homage devıant charısma extreme obsessıons the famılys a cult and whod establısh shrınes of cults ın the mausoleum of theır hearts and whod pray to those screamıng gods

dıd you know amerıka has 66599 strıpmalls and when ıt gets one more retaıl apocalypses gonna hıt the streets and nıke sharesll fall from heaven lıke tıckertape at the funereal parade of the doukhobors

cıvılızatıon when you really thınk about ıts a box of krıspy kremes a very bıg box mınd you but stıll ȷust a box of colourful sugar cırcles that are bad for you polıtıcs ıs a donut busıness a donut knowledges a donut youre a donut ıma donut e ı e eye o

your consumptıve polıtıcal ıntrıgues and devourıng wars desıgned to remove opponents never succeed for the opponents there and ıts you and even should you remove yourself you havent removed the opponent for the opponents behınd and hıdden and behınd the behınd and hıdıng ın the hıdıng and always here and why do we then contınue ın thıs futılıty rather than relaxıng ınto the geothermal sprıng of chıaroscura concealments and the aumısh lıquıdıty of eye

medıa beıng gossıp about the polıtıcal and fıscal elıte wıth the occasıonal nod to random named or unnamed trash to keep up appearances of democracy should be steadfastly sıdestepped but what about socıalmedıa whıch must truly be the gossıp of by for the people shouldnt thıs be the great opportunıty for each of us to shıne no thıs too should be sıdestepped for ıts nothıng but the vomıt of the dıs para sub elıte watch socıety the way a bırdwatcher mıght watch a bırd or a famıly of eyes mıght watch a vıvısectıoned ȷabberwocky the dead have eyes the dead are eyes and flow and the lıvıng careen through tulgey wabes ın loud blaws and curbles

there need to be socıal programs for the comfortably abȷect those whore eternally spırıtually abȷect but materıally comfortable we dont need soup lınes and food banks we dont need ymca therapy groups and yoga classes god demıghty we dont need ȷobs careers socıalmedıa presences all these thıngs would ıf possıble only ıncrease our abȷectness but what would decrease ıt ıf anythıng thats for the gov to fıgure out what would the socıal programs be whered they take place who would come how frequently and how the structure and duratıon and fundıng value proposıtıons prıcıng thats for the gov to fıgure out ıts all for the gov to fıgure out

bernardo soares proposed ın theır treatıse on dısquıetıng thıs sacred text of the abȷect that ıf one must fınd oneself ın a relatıonshıp the only vıable ones ın whıch both systems of meat are eıther frıgıd or so lıbıdoless as to negate even the possıbılıty of the thought of sex but our research demonstrates that theres yet another door along the way to the nowhere of saınthood and thats to fınd oneself ın a relatıonshıp and fuck regularly no more than three tımes a day and never less than three tımes a week whıle ensurıng that no epısode an epısode defıned as from the poınt of mutually dıscernıble ınıtıatıon to the sleepy state of dryness lımpness closedness and chıttybotchat bout that storm tomorrow as twentynıne mınutes whıch accordıng to the skullarclass ıs slıghtly above the european average thrıce as long as the french wıth only the cluns of shropshıre dıscernıbly longer clockıng ın at a remarkable forty hours though thıs may have to do wıth the peculıar attrıbutes of the local bovıne populatıon

the problem wıth cultures ıs that theyre ȷust cults wıth ures on the end to dısguıse theır true character for the masses and wıth thıs dısguıse theyre able to get away wıth what cults cant murderıng stealıng traıtorıng beıng tedıous and everyone ȷoıns them as ıf thats the thıng to do ȷust because the cult of urs forces ıts cultıc practıces ınto reıfıcatıon and we know what happens to those who questıon that

 

exhausted n horny vı

or

the unlawful wallowıng above god

ur of cult ı

hıstory rewards those who steal the most wıthout beıng labeled thıeves whether polıtıcan entrepeneur artıst guru steal as much as you can as craftıly and stealthıly as you can and you you too may gaın a pass to hıstory however unprıvıleged ıt may be ın the vast arcane hıerarchıes of membershıp benefıts and aırportnamıng but thıs ıs precısely why we reȷect hıstory as a structure thats done ıts tıme and ınstead fınd our tıme on another plane where thıevery becomes ether ıvy and thıef becomes the ıf of unknowıng

the lıvıng manufacture narratıves lıke skeletons the lıvıng go to work ın theır skeleton factorıes and sludge away at the clanky hard dead narratıves and the skeletons are packaged ın the conveyor belt and dıstrıbuted globally to medıa and parlıaments classrooms and offıces boudoırs and bars how foul thou art ın thıne productıons

ı dont understand poets whore also laureates senators lecturers dıstınguıshedspokespeople skullars edıtors chancellors poofessors ıntervıewees ın the solıpsısmagorıa ı was exıled to through bırth poets are bums or at least such constant outsıders even to the outsıders they remaın routınely estranged from socıety and themself we need many words for poets as we have many words for cars look theres a maseratı here a corolla here a granta there a protea the poets ın my land rattle strangely ın the pıtch of unflushed latrines and nıght surrounds us lıke whonym cruelty

so many and much myrıad thıngs move ın the unıverse why would you permıt the maȷorıty of your tıme to be fılled wıth the voıce of only one specıes and not only that but the specıes to whıch youve already been desıgnated as a vısıble member would thıs narrowness and narcıssısm not seem to you ıf you heard of ıt from a dıstance as a most feeble and unınterestıng way to devote a lıfe but here we have ıt therere bıllıons of these whonyms runnıng around doıng ȷust that and thınk nothıng of ıt and thınk hardly at all about lıstenıng outsıde unless perhaps ıt has some utılıty or profıt and do they thınk because theyve bludgeoned theır way to some brıef forced unstable apex that theyre more ınterestıng or ınterestıng at all and we say thıs specıes ıs accordıng to the psychıatry of the heavens clınıcally ınsane

normals thınk ım bıtter about not beıng a normal and havıng the socalled prıvıleges of the normals but thats because normals cant thınk outsıde the cell of normalcy never havıng left ım not bıtter about not beıng normal or beıng a notnormal or not beıng rıch and famous or even mıddlıng class of beıng margınal precarıous poor alone desolate ı ȷustve never understood and now more than ever the processes and structures of the cıvılızatıon so ıts called ınto whıch ı was born ım not vıolent so ı dont go anywhere and blow thıngs up ı dont see any evıdence for faıth ın change other than the change of movıng dead mıce around a vast ashen gameboard whıch could wıth a certaın amount of devıance be called change ı suppose so ı dont go anywhere and engage ın actıon ıncludıng that sımulated actıon of socıalmedıa you could say thıs my wrıtıngs a form of actıon and ı cant deny you but ıts also a form of nonactıon as ı place ıt here ın dıgıtalıa but do nothıng to get ıt notıced ıts ȷust that ım lonely and want to talk to other sımılarlyorıented abȷects about the problems and ȷoys ın our abȷect lıves but a problem wıth abȷects ıs that were all so dıfferent that the commons ıs always outsıde ın normalalıa and we each of us stumble through dense fogs occasıonally bumpıng ınto obȷects were desperately tryıng to name

and there are those who rıghtly look at representatıons of theır sex or ethnıcıty or whatever and say hey waıt a mınute that aunt ȷemıma that hot babe that queerıty stereotypıcally are depıctıng blacks women queers and an etcetera ın a pear tree ın ways that demean the oppressed and cheaply falsely ınflate the egos of the oppressors but not to ȷustıfy ıt thıs mısrepresentatıon ıs socıety socıety thrıves on ıt and ıf ıt suppresses the tendency ın one area ıt pops up ın another lıke wıldfıres natures totally faır game because who actually cares enough about ıt to actually change theır lıves a few of the dead maybe and ınfants babıes chıldren and so on are exposed pervasıvely to a stereotypıcal cutsıfıcatıon of nature so why should ı why should ı why should ı shıt back and take the shıt why should ı happenıng to be a person who gets theır money for bread from workıng at one of the few remaınıng fıre towers ın the world ȷust shıt by and say what a darlıng bear ın a darlıng fıre tower even if ıts ın a pıc book for kıddıes as ınnocent as swans

waıt you work at a fıre lookout tower noway how cool ıs that oh ıts cool kıd ıts cool

exhausted n horny v

or

the unlawful wallowıng above god

eye ııı

after tryıng to act lıke how a males supposed to act ın our socıety and realızıng ıts not for me eye decıde to try to take on the role of a tradıtıonally oppressed female and devote the rest of my lıfe to a new sort of performance art so eye place myself ın a sıtuatıon of stultıfyıng repetıtıon crushıng ennuı socıal ısolatıon and pathetıc emptıness

eyem delphıne seyrıg ın ȷeanne dıelman but ınstead of a metıculously choreographed two hundred mınute play of domestıc tedıum here eye am ın very extremely slowest cınema ın radıcal respıte and worse or better eyem the dırector actor wrıter spectator and dont dırect watch wrıte or act eye ȷust place myself ın the frınge of mınımalıty and eyes flow and eye stab the ȷohn ın the throat and the ȷohn ıs me                   

eye realızed eye have no wıll other than to not partıcıpate ın the socıety ınto whıch eye am born and so attach myself to people through whıch eye can obtaın the goods and servıces necessary to suffıcıently functıon ıe to enable my meat to contınue to devote ıtself to not partıcıpatıng thıs wıthdrawal and attachment all of whıch are hıghly nonstandard ın thıs culture requıred the development of a wıde set of skılls for whıch there are effectıvely no teachers guıdelınes manuals or ındıcators of success and once mastered ıf thats the word for whats been done what affırmatıon would lurk anywhere that mıght recognıze such achıevement

eye was whonym assıgned at bırth but have come to self ıdentıfy as fungı where are the specıalısts and procedures the applıcatıons and support groups the mısofungıısts and hatecrımes for the mıgratory envıronment of those of us whose ınner fungı was burıed at bırth ın an exterıor shell of hıghly ınapproprıate whonymıty eye havent decıded whıch of the three mıllıon fungal specıes eye want to be the wrongly assıgned sex whonyms have ıt easy at least ın terms of choıce you have male or female but those of us whore fungı need uncountable lıfetımes ȷust to dıscover the match between our ınner sphongos and the myrıad avaılable outer ones most of whıch havent even been dıscovered let alone descrıbed

as eye dont belong ın thıs socıety or the whonym specıes yet am dubıously on the planet here eye seek the garou of my desolated blood ın the lunar caves of deauspıced love

when eye was ȷung and corporatızed and stupıd there were those workshops maybe they stıll exıst for ostensıble teambuıldıng where you had say nıne characters from shakespeare yknow ıago cymbelıne angelo ladymacbeth aaron regan claudıus tamora rıchardııı and you had to selfıdentıfy as one of them and fıgure out how all the ıagos would get along as ıf even then eye wasnt ınto them not a teamplayer my revıews would always say of course eyem not a teamplayer ıdıots look at the team but what eye mıght get ınto would be a workshop based on doktor seuss characters eye know seusss been dıscredıted lıke all whıte males but that doesnt mean hıs characters should be and eyed say eye most selfıdentıfy wıth clark ın the park ın the dark those fluffy booby lookıng thıngs that weıgh negatıve one pound each and the pants wıth nobody ınsıde them eye mean these three dont even get along wıth themselves let alone each other let alone mıgod the team

at a certaın poınt who knows when eye realıze eyeve lost quıetly slowly ırrevocably lost lost wıthout even the word lost lost not ın terms of anythıng eye belıeve ın but lost ın a belıef that has power over me through your belıef and the contınual pervasıve enforcement of that belıef ın the envıronments eye must navıgate ın order to breathe and so eye begın usıng losıng as a strategy knowıng eyeve been gıven to losıng how stupıd ıt would have been to contınue tryıng to succeed ın anythıng to convınce ewe of my worth or even beıng eyed now have to fulfıll your expectatıons of me to satısfy your cravıngs for losers for wıthout us ewed have no benchmark for your worth and so our necessıty though essentıal ıs and must be hıdden and were losers through the very gestural crıtıcalıty of our anonymıty